Friday, December 31, 2021

My mother would be 105

Today (US time) is my mother’s birthday, and it’s her 105th. I have to admit that the chaos of the past 2 years, 3 months has made it hard for me to focus on much, including my parents’ birthdays, but I do try. Sometimes, trying is all I can manage. Like this year.

I don’t have much to add to what I’ve said in previous years (see the list of those posts below), not because I don’t have anything to say, nor because I don’t want to, but simply because I find it hard to focus on much of anything. Maybe next year will be better?

As happened last year, I remembered my mother’s birthday yesterday, but decided to continue what I started in 2019, when I said, “I realised it’s actually more appropriate to talk about her birthday on what was the date she experienced, not a day earlier as I’d done on this blog.” Since then, I’ve come to think I’m probably right about that. It’s fun to “celebrate” my birthday over all the times zones, and so, over two days, but she never visited this part of the world, so it’s not quite as relevant.

Just as I was last year, though, I’m still struggling with blogging, even routine annual posts. That meant it was impossible for me to say anything yesterday, even if I'd planned to. The thing is, one of the main reasons for these annual posts has been to I remember, because when she was alive her birthday often got lost amid all the holidays this time of year. These posts have always been one small, tiny, way that I can try to make that right.

There were years when my mother wasn’t that much into her birthday, just as I haven’t been into my past two birthdays (and don’t expect to be into mine next month, either). I think that on some level, my mother would get me on that. Maybe that’s one of her gifts to me.

Still, I remember her birthday every year, even the past few when I’ve been so useless at offering a decent commemoration. She deserves better—and I hope to do that for her. Actually, I hope we both get that “better” we deserve in the New Year.

Meanwhile, Happy Birthday, Mom, and thanks. Always.

Previous birthday posts:
Remembering my mother’s birthday in 2020 (2020)
Remembering my mother’s birthday in a new life (2019)
Still remembering my mother’s birthday (2018)
Remembering my mother’s birthday (2017)
My mom would be 100 (2016)
Mom at 99 (2015)
Remembering my mother (2014)
Mom’s birthday (2013)
Mom’s treasure (2012)
Remembering birthdays (2011)
That time of year (2009)
Memories and words (2008)

Tears of a clown
– A 2009 post that’s still one of my favourites about my mother.

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