Saturday, April 04, 2009

Planet Wingnut explodes

It’s been a tough week for the residents of Planet Wingnut, an alternate reality that exists alongside our own. Those of us who live in the real world have probably barely noticed some of the things rocking Planet Wingnut, and we certainly haven’t seen them from the dark place where the Wingnuttians dwell.

The Vermont House of Representatives approved marriage equality by a vote of 95-52, despite Wingnuts using robocalls to try and harass normal people into joining the Wingnuttian dark side on the issue. The state’s senate earlier approved a different version, so they’ll need to reconcile the bills before sending the final version to the Republican Governor for his promised veto in the first act of his 2012 campaign for the Republican presidential nomination (or so Vermonters say). The legislature will attempt to override Governor Pander’s (not his real name) veto and, if they succeed, there will be popping sounds all over Planet Wingnut as heads explode.

Then the Iowa Supreme Court ruled unanimously that a 1998 state law restricting civil marriage to one man and one woman violates the equal protection clause of the Iowa state constitution. Same-sex marriages will be legal in Iowa in three weeks, beginning April 24. Reality-impaired residents of Planet Wingnut have declared that Iowa will now have crop failures, but they haven’t yet said whether the crops will fail before or after the aliens make their circles in them.

All of that was on top of their continual apoplexy about the very existence of President Obama who is, as they all know, a communistsocialistfascist dictator. In case you’re unfamiliar with who the Wingnuts are foaming and frothing about, it’s the guy who has a 2/3 approval rating, the guy who leads a county in which the number of people who think the country is heading in the right direction has tripled since Inauguration Day. Yeah, that dictator.

Planet Wingnut is a place where things are simple and absolute, where thinking isn’t permitted—and neither is any connection to reality.


Lord Byron said...

The non-wingnuts in Davenport IA are rallying even as I type tonight. Their rhetoric is along the lines of "Iowa is the home of fairness."
A local Rabbi was on TV saying "Why shouldn't these who love each other faithfully and devotedly have the same rights as my wife and I do?

Arthur Schenck said...

See? Real, rational people can see sense and know fairness and justice. Our planet is so much better and nicer than Planet Wingnut, don't you think?