An odd, mostly not notable anniversary

Today is the third anniversary of when the last house that Nigel and I shared went to new owners, and that happened six months to the very day after Nigel died. I would never have expected it, but I seem to have added this anniversary to my list: Clearly  I can’t forget it, and, in fact, it’s been on my mind lately. Apparently it is every year now.

Last year on this date, I wrote a post about this anniversary, and I noted that it was an “odd semi-notable, mostly not notable anniversary”. That’s very true, and I’ve been puzzled by it and the fact that I’m always aware of it. Looking back what I said on this day in 2020, 2021, and 2022, I can see there’s been a bit of reflection, but my question is, why? I mean, it’s not like there aren’t plenty of other days I feel reflective.

I think the answer is the strange—and very powerful—convergence of things happening around that time. The fact that the sale of our final house together happened six months after Nigel died to the very day powerfully cemented those two things together. Then, of course, a mere five days later New Zealand went under its first Covid lockdown. If the sale of our house hadn’t been completed before Lockdown began, it’s possible the sale may have fallen through, or, at the very least, it would’ve been delayed for some five weeks. I was keenly aware of that at the time, and felt very relieved and lucky that Lockdown wasn’t even announced until a few days after the transfer of ownership was finalised.

But there’s clearly more to this than all that, something I don’t fully understand. I posted the image up top to my personal Facebook this morning, and realised only when I started to put this post together that I did that in both 2021 and 2022, too, though those were about the half-year point between Horrible Anniversaries. I think that the house sale was back in the mix this year because housing has been on my mind a lot over the past year or so, mostly because I feel so unsettled—and, of course, the very reason I feel so unsettled is what happened three and a half years ago today.

I don’t know whether I’ll remember this anniversary next year or not, but I bet I will: March 20 next year will be six months from the fifth Horrible Anniversary, and I know for certain that will be on my mind a lot.

Still, there are things to do, things I’m doing, and there are things I’ve done toward building a new life. It doesn't bother me in the least if I need to take some time out to reflect on where I came from, where I’m at, and where I might go, and if that means noting an “odd semi-notable, mostly not notable anniversary”, I’m fine with that, too.

Previously

2020: Six months
2021: 78 weeks today
2022: Some things, I don’t forget