The annual increasing number: 64

Well, well—another birthday! This year isn’t a “significant” one (not a notable age, in other words), but I observe them all. I always used to say that “having birthdays beats the alternative,” and it’s obviously something I understand even more now.

This year, I invited the Hamilton family around on Friday for a low-key thing similar to the weekely get-togethers we used to have. We ended up having pizza, which is always a favourite of mine, organised by one of my sisters-in-law. As usual, everyone had left before dark (it stays light until nearly 10pm this time of year), and Leo and I had a quiet rest of the evening. Leo had a particularly quiet evening: Having visitors wore him out.

The next morning, my cousin-in-law picked me up and we went to the Tamahere Country Market, something I haven’t been to in a very long time (no particular reason). After that we went to a new-ish cafe in the area we wanted to try, and my cousin bought me lunch for my birthday. We stopped at a couple shops, then went and visited my Nigel’s mum before heading home. My cousin dropped me off early in the afternoon.

That was pretty much my day: I was very sleepy by then, mostly because I’d been up just a bit too late Friday evening, and I’d had a terrible nights sleep a couple nights before that. This is why I couldn't finish this post last night. Actually, I didn’t even open the bottle of bubbles I’d put in the fridge to have to celebrate my birthday (maybe this evening).

My annual birthday selfie is at the bottom of this post, and I almost didn’t share in on social media yesterday evening. When I did, to Instagram, I said:

Leo joined me for my annual birthday selfie this year. He’d just finished singing “Happy Birthday” to me, and I’m actually not kidding—it’s the only song he sings along with (I had to help him, which was a *little* odd for me, LOL). I look so tired because I am—I had a bad night’s sleep last night, so I’ve been sleepy all day. It happens. But I had a good birthday, anyway.

When I looked at a larger version of the photo on my iPad, I decided the photo was nice despite me looking tired, so I shared it. It’s now also my profile photo on Facebook, because the past two years my birthday selfie became my profile photo for the year. This year, I’d like to change it from time to time like I used to do.

I said earlier that it wasn’t a significant birthday this year, and that’s because my specific age isn’t. However, 64 IS significant in a way that’s meaningful to me: I’ve now attained an age my parents never did. A few months ago, I reached the age at which I’d lived longer than either of them did, but when I hit 64, that milestone was unquestionably over. I’ve been aware of that point for decades, especially when I neared 60. Now, that’s done. So: What’s the next one?

I suppose the next milestone would be to live longer than all my grandparents, but in the case of my dad’s dad, that’d mean living nearly three more decades. Right now, that seems like too big a mountain, but, maybe? I don’t actually care, but in high school I was certain I’d live to “at least” 120. That’d mean living the better part of six decades more. Um…

I still believe that having birthdays beats the alternative (though three—or six!—decades more seems a bit greedy…). I’ve been fortunate that, despite everything, my birthdays since Nigel died haven't been awful, and most have been quite nice (though the first one without him was pretty bad).

None of us knows how long we’ve got, how many years (or decades…) we are from the end of the annual increasing number. I’m at peace with that, something that wasn’t possible when I worried about leaving Nigel alone. That’s the one and only thing I can think of that’s actually liberating about being a widower. There had to be something, I guess.

So, once again, my annual increasing number happened. It wasn’t a significant age to reach, except to me, but every age achieved is a gift. That’s another thing I understand even more now.

The Illinois Route 64 sign is a public domain graphic available from Wikimedia Commons. Illinois Route 64 runs roughly east-west across the state, between Chicago’s Lake Shore Drive and the Mississippi River, where it crosses into Iowa and becomes Iowa Highway 64. I have no idea whether I ever drove on Illinois Route 64 or not, but it’s entirely possible.

The Interstate 64 sign is also a public domain graphic available from Wikimedia Commons. Interstate 64 crosses Illinois from the Mississippi River at St. Louis to the Indiana state line at the Wabash River. I have definitely driven on Interstate 64 because it’s briefly concurrent with Interstate 57 near Mt Vernon, Illinois, and I-57 was the road I took between my university and my hometown.

My Previous Birthday posts:

2022: The annual increasing number: 63
2021: The annual increasing number: 62
2020: The annual number increase happened
2019: Another 'Big Birthday'
2018: The annual increasing number: 59
2017: The annual increasing number: 58
2016: The annual increasing number: 57
2015: The annual increasing number: 56
2014: The annual increasing number: 55
2013: The annual increasing number: 54
2012: The annual increasing number
2011: The annual increasing number
2010: The annual increasing number
2009: Happy Birthday to Me…
2008: Another Birthday