I’m going to live

I can remember the precise moment I realised that I’m not going to die. I was walking down the hallway that connects all the bedrooms to the living areas, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a painting a friend of ours painted and gave to us for our Civil Union. Our friend died from motor neurone disease in the year before Nigel died, and as I paused to look at the painting, I thought about how she was gone and Nigel was gone, and then it hit me: I’d spent all of my time since Nigel died expecting that I could die at virtually any moment, but clearly that was no more likely for me than for many others. I realised that if I wasn’t about to die, then I’d better focus on the business of not merely living, but having a good life. That, in turn, meant redoubling my efforts to have a good aging.

That was the moment everything changed.

I’d been thinking about what government officials like to call “ageing in place”, that is, growing old in our own homes, with support services gradually added as we need them, all designed to help us live long, healthy lives in our own homes, without having to go into care until/unless it’s truly necessary. Seeing the painting that day later helped me focus on what I needed to do.

I chose my house because it’s one storey (no steps), and after I moved in I installed the solar power system so that it could help keep my power bills as low as possible so that I’d have more money to pay for living, not merely existing. I have further plans to upgrade this house to make it even better for me (and, to be honest, for the eventual resale, in case I need or want to sell it, even if that’s not until well in the future).

However, there was more to this planning than merely making my house elderly-me friendly, there’s all the time between now and then, too. So, I decided to work on myself to try and keep mobility and flexibility as I age. This led to my biggest work on myself, probably ever.

Last December, I started walking two or three times a week. Then, on Monday, January 6, I began walking every single day, which means that this past week was my seventh consecutive week of this daily routine. There have been positive results, some subjective, but at at least one that’s clearly measurable.

Before talking about what I did and why, it’s important, if obvious, to note that this is about my personal journey in health and aging, and shouldn’t be taken as advice. I will say, however, that any exercise is better than none, but how much is enough—or too much—will vary from person to person. It’s a good idea, especially for us older folks, to talk to our doctor before starting any exercise programme—but I didn’t do that, even though I absolutely should have.

That out of the way, here’s what I did and why.

My Apple Watch tracks minutes of exercise (the green ring), movement (the red ring, and an estimate of kilojoules/calories burned), and whether I stand for at least 5 minutes every hour fir 12 hours per day (the light blue ring). My progress throughout the day is tacked on those rings, and the goal is to close all three rings every day (there’s an example at left, from February 21, 2023). My Apple Watch’s week is from Monday through Sunday (I have no idea why or if that can be changed, and I frankly don’t care), and that’s why my daily walking routine began on a Monday.

My routine was to walk two kilometres (1.24274 miles) every weekday, and one kilometre (0.621371 miles) on Saturday and Sunday. On weekends, I actually walk a bit farther than one kilometre per day because, generally speaking, my watch requires a “workout” to be at least 15 minutes to register it as a workout, and since my average pace for one kilometre is faster than that, I keep walking until I pass 15 minutes. I also end up walking a bit more than two kilometres on weekdays, too, mostly because I can.

My Apple Watch also sends me rewards badges, first for each ring on my watch as I close them, then another when I close all three rings, plus badges for a perfect week (closing the ring every day), and a perfect month (closing them every day of a month). There are additional monthly challenges, and there was one more I never got: Doing seven workouts over that Monday-Sunday week (the watch can track many different kinds of workouts, including both indoor and outdoor walks). Getting those badges every day and week is a surprisingly strong motivator for me.

For some reason I assumed that the workout challenge was to do workouts on all seven days of a week, but this week I suddenly realised that it’s actually seven workouts total, not per day. So, this week I experimented with doing two shorter walks on both Wednesday and Friday of this week, each walk a bit more than a kilometre. This meant that I did seven walking workouts on Monday to Friday, and, as I suspected, I got my reward badge on Friday (the image at the top of this post). That means I could’ve taken the weekend off from walking if I wanted to (I didn’t, but in the future I may use one of the two days as a “rest day”).

I first felt my walks affecting my calves, then my thighs, and finally my hip flexor muscles, all of which felt stronger. Over time, I noticed my balance had improved, that I was easily able to stand on one foot. My knees seem more reliable, and even my lower back doesn’t get sore like it used to, and I also noticed that it had become somewhat easier for me to get up off the floor (like after I scrub the shower floor). Gaining flexibility and greater balance is precisely what I was trying to achieve, but all of that’s entirely subjective. Fortunately, there’s now an objective improvement.

I’ve been getting annual blood tests for years, and I have a spreadsheet with the results dating back to 2011 (though there’s a five year gap between those first results and the next ones, probably because I lost the forms for some years’ results. Nevertheless, one of the consistent things has been that my HDL (“good cholesterol”) has always been too low. It’s supposed to be greater than 1.00 mmol/L (“millimoles per litre”), however, mine has never reached that. My worst (lowest) reading was 0.64, and my best was 0.90. Last year’s result was 0.88, but my most recent blood drawn on February 5 showed my HDL was at a new high of 0.92—the best reading ever, as far as I know. I’d always been told I needed to exercise more since it’s the only way to significantly improve the HDL level, and my new result came after I’d been doing daily walks for around a month, and doing walking workouts at least some days for roughly six weeks. If I keep walking/exercising, I may eventually finally pass 1.00 mmol/L.

In summary, my legs feel stronger, my balance and flexibility has improved, and I’ve raised my HDL levels, all of which gives me an incentive to continue (that and getting those Apple Watch badges…). However, I haven’t noticeably lost any weight, but that wasn’t goal at this point; that will come over time. This is a process, of course, and I still have a long way to go.

I have a cross-trainer (also called an elliptical) in the garage, but I don’t yet feel anywhere near fit enough to use it—although, it’s been way too hot in the garage to use it, anyway. The elliptical also helps with upper-body work, though I have other plans to help with that, too—after I take off my training wheels, so to speak. My plan is to slowly build my strength and stamina, then add more and different routines to target different areas, all with the same goal of strengthening the muscles associated with balance, stability on my feet, and even pain avoidance (lower back, for example). I want to be as mobile as possible for as long as possible, and I’m the only one who can do anything to help make that happen.

It’s still early days for all of this, but I definitely feel better, stronger, and more flexible, to varying degrees, and that’s more than enough incentive for me to keep going. All I really want is to have the best life I can have, regardless of how many or few years may be ahead of me. I finally understand that I’m not going to die, after all, not right now, and that it’s up to me if I want to be able to live whatever life I still have to the fullest. I think I’m well on the way to making sure that happens, one step at a time.