29 years ago today

Another year, another anniversary: 29 years ago today, I arrived in New Zealand as a tourist and Nigel and I met in person for the first time. As I said last year, “That went well: I was back to live here permanently seven weeks later.” That anniversary has changed often over the years, and it’s quite positive now, though, obviously, tinged with some sadness. Maybe it’s literally true that everything changes.

September is my least favourite month because of The Horrible Anniversary the end of next week, however, that doesn’t meant it’s unrelentingly bad or even just sad. There are high points in this month, and today’s anniversary is one of them: Had I not been able to travel to New Zealand, it’s entirely possible that what Nigel and I were building from afar would’ve burned out because it was just too difficult. Maybe not, but we couldn’t have known that: There’s little in life that’s definite or certain, and everything about my life over the past 29 years underscores that.

First, there was the fact that Nigel and I met at all, that I was able to come to New Zealand (because a friend who was a travel agent gave me a ticket), the fact that Nigel and I were as connected in person as we’d been over the thousands of kilometres, and then the fact I was able to secure a visa and work permit so I could live here. Not only was none of that certain, much of it would have seemed improbable before it wasn’t.

My story, then, is filled with improbable events that ultimately led me to where I am, literally and figuratively, today. The fact that this day in 1995 led to Nigel and me deciding build a life together is precisely the reason I picked this date for the start of my otherwise tongue-in-cheek “Season of Anniversaries”, which included events from today through to January, all of which are now coloured by what happened this month in 2019.

Despite all the shadow cast on today and the other dates in my “Season of Anniversaries”, I nevertheless always remember them all as they approach and then arrive, and all of them are actually quite positive now. That’s mostly because I have a sense of gratitude for what I had, and the fact everything changed, that I lost I the love of my life, doesn’t change the fact that up until 2019, this month, like all the others in the "Season", are, overall, good and positive. As I put it in last year’s two-anniversary combo blog post, “Despite everything, the good stuff is—by far—what I think about the most. Always.” That’s still true for all the anniversaries in the “Season”, even the horrible one. I’d rather have my old life than be grateful for what I used to have—obviously—but today reminds me that good things can happen no matter how improbable they may be. I guess that’s the motto for this particular anniversary; it’s a good one.

Previous posts about my arrival anniversary (the first three and 2023 only mention it):

Anniversary Time (2007)
Blogoversary 2 (2008)
Anniversaries Three and Fourteen (2009)
Where it began (2010)
Anniversary of the beginning (2011)
Another anniversary (2012)
18 years ago today (2013)
19 years ago today (2014)
Twenty years ago today (2015)
21 years ago today (2016)
22 years ago today (2017)
23 years ago today (2018)
24 years ago today (2019)
25 years ago today (2020)
26 years ago today (2021)
26 years ago today (2022)
Anniversaries 17 and 28 (2023)