Wednesday, July 22, 2020

Representative of my life right now

A post shared by arthur_amerinz (@arthur_amerinz) on

The post above was the first I shared on Instagram. So much has changed in the seven years since: Three and a bit years later, I’d be in hospital getting a cardiac stent, six months after that, Nigel and I moved to the southern edge of the Manukau Harbour. Six years after this photo, we were a month out from what would be Nigel’s last birthday (I never blogged about Nigel’s birthdays).

Now, the dogs and I are in a new house alone, without Nigel, in a different city than the photo was taken in, and, seven years after I took it, I think that photo’s representative of where I’m at in my life right now: Some things are obvious, some are indistinct, but it’s kind of hard for me to see anything clearly. It’s familiar and strange all at the same time. And the thing I notice the most about it is something I noticed back then, but didn’t pay much attention to: A feeling of aloneness and loneliness. Like I said, it’s representative of where I’m at in my life.
And today it’s cold and raining. Seems appropriate, somehow.

Related: “And another” – my blog post about that photo, published the same day I posted it to Instagram, July 22, 2013. Back then, I didn’t embed the original post as I did above. Like I said, so much has changed.

This is a revised and expanded version of something I posted to my personal Facebook this morning. Among other things, I added links to relevant blog posts.

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